Pretending to live the Celebrity Life online

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Brief Summary (in Tagalog): Magtira ng konting privacy para sa sarili. Hindi lahat ng bagay ay dapat ishare. Lalo na sa social media. Sarilinin mo nalang ang gusot sa pamilya o away mag asawa. Pribado na yon. Post ka ng post, tapos mababadtrip ka kung gagawing pulutan sa inuman ang kwento ng buhay mo. - FB

It's no doubt that the times have changed.

From the intimate secrecy of relationships, to the long conversations on the telephone, to the instant text messages, now the instant broadcast of feelings, love, and news and gossip,everything now comes quick and it's now easier to judge and talk about people.

A new party, what they're doing today, what they're eating or wearing, who they met, a new relationship status, a girlfriend or boyfriend, this generation (and the next) rarely keeps anything "unshared, unuploaded, or unposted". And when you're top story of the day, suddenly, it's like everyone wants to know about you and your story. Everyone is so interested in what you have to say. And everyone is subscribed.


Everyone's interested in a surprise relationship status change.

If you should pick up one sensible thing from this post, it's that you have to be careful of the things you share with others. It's hard to tell the difference between the people who are just in it for the gossip from those who actually care. You don't have to tell anyone about how you feel when you broke up with he-who-shall-not-be-named, you don't have to justify yourself or your actions online! No one needs to know, really. Some people just take pleasure in seeing misery, and drama, and... unhappiness.

If they really care, they would approach you. If they matter, you should tell them. Not all your 900+ friends matter. Not all of them would understand. Not all of them need to know.

You go ask any big time celebrity how they feel about their privacy. Cross out Kris Aquino, and you'll be surprised how many celebrities try their best to keep their personal life in hiding. Some people care so much about their actions, and come to the point of even mailing them hate mails to get their personal insight (usually of disappointment) across. Sure that might sound fun for people who need or crave the attention, but seriously. Get a life.

You need not come to that point that people (acquaintances, online friends, and soon... strangers) will actually intrude and suddenly feel that they have a responsibility to ask you or about your problems. Your problems are not meant to be shared online. Especially, everything about your new relationship status.

Social media makes it suddenly easier for everyone to judge. And everything you share can make or break you. For some people, they wouldn't even give you the time of day to explain what you meant in a post and judge you right away, sharing the link with other friends who will also inhibit the same judgement. And before you know it, you're a hot topic, a blind item, a bad kid.

You shout your feelings of affection or hatred, sharing a piece of yourself to billions of people online. To you, it's important and you're important. To billions of people, you're probably just another attention-seeker.

And you will regret it. Jessi Slaughter has.

Sure, I'm being a hypocrite here. I have a blog! But posting "He does not deserve me! He will forever rot in hell!" or just plain judging someone on why she's dating him... that's kind of another level. I do keep those things, and my evil eyes to myself. I suggest we play low-key. All of us. For the sake of the next generation (who as we all can assume... isn't doing very well either).

10 comments:

  1. I quite agree with this. Sometimes, it's a question whether the "information shared" has crossed the "too much information shared" line.

    As I writer, I quite know how writing my thoughts and my feelings help. It does. Immensely. It has lead me to writing prose I never could come up with if I wasn't feeling what I was feeling (most usually, misery and melancholy).

    But then, when it comes to "dear diary" types of writing... I've learned (somewhat the hard way) to keep those for my eyes only. I've found myself writing about people who I was at that time, infatuated with, proclaiming things that I now cringe at, or calling out people in my life who've wronged me or hurt me. Naturally, as part of the human psyche, the story revolves around me. How I am the hero, how I am the victim etc.

    And in the end, I will be judged. I am judged. I have experienced being reminded of things that I would rather forget about and it sucks. As much as we know and claim that we became better people, it's that shadow that we ourselves created that would continue to haunt us. We are to blame. We are responsible.

    There is the saying that we should not care for what other people think and do what makes us happy, but then, we should also remember that what makes us happy now may not be necessarily the responsible thing to do. So it's up to us to learn from those mistakes.

    In this age and time, social networking and accessibility of information has made our world a much smaller place to live in. It's an undeniable fact. It is just up to us to learn how to control it.

    Anyway, sorry for the thought and word vomit. Just goes to show how much I liked the post. :))

    P.S. Insert OMGWTF reaction at the screencap at the end. I've got some stuff I would like to say about it, but then again, I'll cut him some slack since he's just a kid.

    But then again, WTF?

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  2. Once again, Glerren, you have proven your wisdom in your words.

    "He's just a kid" should never be an excuse anymore. We've got 10 year old's already doing the deed. They can't play coy or be ignorant about this sad reality.

    People claim that there's a thin line between the good kind of sharing and too much sharing. But... it's a very thick line actually.

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  3. You've got a point there. The question lies on why people choose to ignore or deny something that is clearly in their face already.

    Like a sign that says that it's a dead end, but yet, we choose to forge ahead and see for ourselves if it really is a dead end. Or maybe, just maybe, we will be a special case. But we learn that we aren't. Kahit nagmumura na, o dikaya'y nagsusumigaw na sa harap natin, pinipili nating hindi tingnan kasi iisipin natin na iba tayo. Na ang mga di kanais nais na bagay ay hindi mangyayari satin at pang libro at pelikula lang.

    Again, the natural arrogance and pride that comes with the human psyche. Tayo lagi ang bida sa storya natin. Dapat.

    I would also like to tackle on how this mentality on relationship disclosure -- and how it has influenced more and even younger people -- can also be applied to the sex and partying culture of today. But then, it would take both of our times. Haha!

    Ay shet. Intellectual discussion amp. :))

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  4. Tell me when you're back in the country! Meet up tayo and intellectual discussion galore!

    It's all just in denial. We always have to be right, and we're always just looking for an excuse to act that way.

    Deeply saddened by the last topic you mentioned. Kids today. :(

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  5. Hello ate cat (though we're technically of the same age. hoho) I might as well call you Miss. :) I have read an article in Times magazine of how facebook (and other social networking sites) makes people jealous. Simply stated, we want to share how glamorous ( or the lack thereof) our life is. It's human nature how people become curious about others. But looking at the brighter side, it's about the discipline of how you will manage to focus on your life despite the urge to see everyone's lives online, I think. Hahaha anyway, nice blog miss Cat. :)

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    1. Hi glittergee!

      I agree to everything you've said. I think it's what makes us human, when we compare ourselves to others and have that urge to want more. Although natural, it's also something we can and should control. Discipline, check! Thank you very much for spending time on my site! :)

      Love!

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  6. I agree. I am not really the open type of a person but I thought that if I accept requests from people I do not personally know (but still has mutual friends), it's okay that they see what's happening with my life and ignore what's happening with theirs. And it's okay to tweet what I did seconds ago, what I will do for the next seconds.. But it's not. And this is what I exactly feel. Maybe I should only say and express how I feel in my planner. Much better, and safer :) Thanks Cat, for this!

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    1. Writing on a planner not only practices your handwriting skills, but also creates a great bond between you and paper. I think that's what has been lost... that people stop writing. You don't have to share everything. Mystery is very sexy! Thank you ivy. :)

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